[1. 3] Working with the Dark Goddess🖤🧿✨
8 Ways to Work with Kali
I hope you’ve been as taken with Kali’s story as I have and that her compassionate wisdom brings you comfort in this crazy world.
Today I’m sharing some ways you might work with or embody Kali energy in your life. Kali is here for you through the turbulent chaos of storms. She’s the rumbling earthquake of change, the clearing away of gunk and garbage, the fire that purifies and transforms. She's your rageful and compassionate mother, the starry night sky, Time and Space in infinite directions. Whatever your worries, pains, griefs are you can share with her. And trust that demons are no match for Kali.1
In working with Kali or any of the Dark Goddesses, you’ll explore your Shadow psyche, your sensual and creative energy, and your body’s consciousness. You can invoke Dark Goddesses to support you in seasons of transformation, through your most profound pain, and for strength to terrify and conquer demons 👹
Dance!!!!
The most potent way to connect with the Dark Goddess is through your body.
Have I shared this podcast episode? It’s INCREDIBLE. Padma Menon here talks about finding body-consciousness through dance, how to embody ferocity as part of your spiritual practice, and how movement brings felt sense of liberation. We feel the ramifications of Capitalism in our bodies and it’s our first front to fight back. By tapping in to our Body’s wisdom - what feels good, what’s intuitively right, the messages in our pain - we’re more present and embodied. More human! Revolution can (must?) happen in our bodies.
Put on music that calls your body to move intuitively and freely. Do you want to dance in front of the mirror? In the dark? As a performance? Or sacred self-love ritual? Try some somatic shakes to release stuck energy. Move like a snake or ferocious feline.
Listen to what your body is yearning for, how it desires to be moved and stretched.
Whatever your movement practice is, you can bring a mind-body element to amplify the positive benefits of the practice. Any movement practice can become yogic and meditative by paying attention to your breath, connecting to how you feel, even thinking good thoughts (see Affirmations below).
I grew up training in many styles of dance - ballet, jazz, contemporary. I still love dance because it helps me flexing my Mind-Body connection in different ways - through learning choreography, practicing styles that are less familiar. Dance has always been home for my body because it’s helped me express that which can’t simply through words.
A yoga asana practice is so powerful because it’s like learning the language of our bodies - the different shapes and flows for we can tap into to experience Yin and Yang energy. Here at
I yammer on a lot about the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine, but you can go to a yoga class to get what I’m talking about on a felt level.A YANG style yoga practice will have a lot of Sun Salutations, flowing through asana, focusing on alignment. A Yang style practice is very firy and your breath, your prana or life force energy is flowing.
A YIN style practice will be slower, more flowing, more intuitive. Invitations to take things at a pace that feels good to you. Restful, restorative, meditative.
If you have a yoga practice, I encourage you to practice intuitively, without an instructor or video. What happens when you start flowing? Go at your own pace, learn to connect Mind-Body-Breath on your own, flowing through poses that bring relief or generate heat.2
Try a short Goddess Pose Flow - from Goddess Pose, inhale and reach your arms up out into Star. On exhale sink back down into Goddess Pose and bring arms to football goalpoasts/cactus. Flow through that a few times and try experimenting with Lion’s Breath on exhale - tongue out, loud sigh.
I love this flow because there’s an element of Yin through the intuitive flowing between two poses. There’s also a Yang element with a Lion’s Breath - loud, fierce, terrifying and iconic Kali pose. As we’ve seen, Kali embodies duality, both terrifying Bhadrakali and compassionate maternal Kali Maa.
Embrace Your Duality ☯️
Hot Nerds, Gentle Doms, Grumpy Lovers- your polar contrasts are what make you you-nique. Here’s one way to figure them out.
Make Two Columns:
On one Side: What’s Good about me? What is my Light/Right side? What is my Masculine energy like?
On the Other: What’s Bad about me?What is my Dark/Wrong side? What is my Feminine energy like?
You’ll find the connections from there.
Civil Disobedience & Reclaimiing Radical Narratives
Do you remember the snippet of the mythology from Rama and Sita’s story I shared in 1.1? It was a very long footnote lol but it’s worth re-visiting. That small vignette from the Ramayana in many ways represents the patriarchal, dogmatic, and caste-supremacist values that are at the center of the Hindu Nationalist movement
The inauguration Ram Mandir in Ayodhya, Uttar Pradesh has been been making global headlines for the massive celebrations attended by celebrities, billionaires, and India’s elite.
But the site has a painful history- it is where historic 16th century mosque Babri Masjid, formerly stood. In 1992, Hindu supremacist militant group RSS destroyed the mosque. Today it is being consecrated by the leaders of the militant group alongside Prime Minister Modi.
It signifies a new formalization and normalization of the horrific rise of right-wing Hindu nationalism and represents the stronghold of this supremacist ideology as they celebrate this “new divine India.”
This is why deconstruction of our religions and mythology is so important - they’re being used to weaponize religion for political agendas around the world.
Mythology has always been weaponized to maintain and grow violent political narratives. Learn more about Building Narrative Power. Consider your identities and the politicization of dominant/counternarratives. Consider the violence that is normalized, justified, even celebrated in the name of your dominant identites. How will you dispell these stories? What are the stories you will tell instead?
Honoring Death with Descansos
“Descansos are symbols that mark a death. Right there, right on that spot, someone’s journey in life halted unexpectedly.
To make descansos means taking a look at your life and marking where the small deaths, las muertes chiquitas, and the big deaths, las muertes grandotas, have taken place.” Claudia Estes, Woman Who Runs with the Wolves
Descansos are resting places used to mark sites of a violent, unexpected death. By making descansos, we are able to acknowledge the losses in life we have been silently carrying. We are making a mark in our journey of Grief.
Make descansos. You can use this as a journal prompt, art or map making prompt, or design a ritual by going to a sacred location to mark your losses. Mark your out white crosses, pictures, flowers, memorabilia. What are las muertes chiquitas and las muertes grandotas that have taken place in your life? How will you honor and remember them? How might you give them sweet, nourishing, and nurturing places to rest? Re-visit your descansos once a year.
Carry a Totem 🐯
Find a Dark Goddess symbol that resonates with you and carry it on you as a source of strength, protection, and support through transformation.
Yantras are mystic geometric symbols representing different divine energies. Learn more about yantras and how to use them as part of your meditation practice. Yantras, runes, and powerful ancient symbols can be drawn on a piece of paper and carried or on a precious object for protection.
Invite your Demons to Tea ☕️
Instead of trying to lock you demons away, invite them to tea. Shame, Fear, Rage, Grief can’t wait to meet you for sunday brunch.
You prepare some treats you think they might like. You’ve got a playlist going that’s upbeat but zingy enough to match their energy. Give them warm hugs when they arrive and invite them outside for a long lazy meal.
It turns out they each have great perspective and even a sense of humor. You listen attentively and are enraptured by all they have to share. You take out a notebook to jot down their worries, insights, and hunches.
Mine are loud and have a LOT to say lol, so I can have a hard time keeping up with the chatter or gracefully letting them know that the sun is setting and it’s time for me to turn in. On other days, they need probing or a little bit of 🍃 before they feel ready to share. You’re a fabulous host so you know what to do in order to make yours feel safe and comfortable.
Some conversation starters:
What are some emotions I’ve been avoiding feeling recently? Why? What is so uncomfy about these emotions?
What do I value about myself and why? What am I worthy of? Why?
When the demons take up a lot of space or cause a mess, as sometimes is natural to do - what are some of the consequences? Are there signs or signals before demon meltdowns? How can we compassionately adjust?
How can I move from terrified to terrifying?
What would I be doing if I didn’t care about what people think?
What do I want? What do I really want?
Make Your Art
Frida Kahlo was a true embodiment of Kali energy - fierce, bold, fearless, vulnerable, a firecracker. A mystic artist, a dark spiritualist. AN ICON.
Let Frida inspire you to make your art.
Affirmations for Kali Energy
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How to Use Affirmations:
Affirmations are magical when used like medicine. Step 1 is becoming aware of your state and symptoms. Step 2 is diagnosing what you need. Step 3 is finding the medicine, sometimes through trial-and-error, to find that affirmation or idea/concept that just HITS and you can feel it on a cellular level changing how you see the world.
The blueprint for liberation is in my heart’s greatest desires.
My rage points me to my vision for justice.
I am powerful
I love satisfying my desires and enjoying pleasure
I have opinions and I’m not afraid to share them
I am a force to be reckoned with!!
I am unfuckwithable
I can make anything I want happen
I can survive anything
Nothing matters 😩 Nothing matters 🤪
One of my favorite stories about Kali - In one story she was summoned by a group of criminals who were going to sacrifice a human to her image in order to gain her favour. These bad guys want to impress Kali and they a really good monk, so Kali shows and “proceeds to horribly kill her erstwhile worshipers by decapitating them and drinking their blood.” Talk about being bad to do good 👹🥲🔪
I think a lot of us are drawn to classes because having someone outside of us guiding us, the voice and energy becomes a point of focus for the mind. Being in the calm yoga studio, engaging in the ritual alongside other bodies, you have all these cues inviting you to become mind-body present. A favorite instructor of mine in SF Kirin said at the close of a class, “the real yoga begins now, once you’re off the mat.” and I was like YES!!! The point of yoga, the point of the practice is so that when you’re off the mat, you’re able to embody that Mind-Body attunement, you’re able to find your breath, you’re able to find your seat of awareness, you’re able to find your connection to divinity, whatever that is for you. Being able to practice in ways that are new for you - whether at home, or maybe it is going in to a class. Maybe it’s outside in a park, maybe it’s right before you go to bed - helps you bring more yoga, or Mind-Body connection, to your life.